Friday, November 21, 2008

I think that I have had it with school for a while

I went to school twice this week. I went once on Tuesday, and after a break of more than a week my brain was fried, and I couldn't seem to get anything done. So I left early to run some errands, which turned out to be a really lucky thing since I needed to run those errands and I got a bit sick and didn't feel like doing them later.

So I went to school again on Friday, and except for having a bit of trouble actually getting into the building, that went a lot better. That is, everything went better with the clay. I'm almost done with the green work on the second leaf vase, and I'm thinking that I should go in on Monday and finish up. The main purpose of this project is just to see how long that it takes, so that I'll know how much I should charge for the other one. So far I've spent about nine hours on it.

The bowls and such that I threw still need some touch up work. But, some of them are too dry, and they will just have to do as they are. I'll try to finish the rest Monday or Tuesday.

I really should have done all of this before Tulsa. I don't even really remember what I was doing before Tulsa. I didn't have a cold yet, so that wasn't it. And it obviously did not have anything to do with making the house spotless. Anyway, if I had put in another nine hours or so two weeks ago, then I would have been done with it all by now, and the teacher would have enough stuff to high fire and everybody would be happier now.

I'm not happy. I was thinking at school how this stuff isn't making me happy anymore. I have felt like that before, when a project wasn't going well, but this one is just fine and it still isn't making me happy. I had thought that I would like taking a non-credit class better, that it would be less stressful without having to think about grades and such. And I has been less stressful for the most part. But I do sort of have to think about deadlines if I don't want this semester's work to have been a total waste of time. Right now this just feels like another chore that I have to get through.


Dame Honoria Glossop said...

Maybe you should take a break, do something different, relax. Then it might be fun again.

laughingattheslut said...

I hadn't originally planned to take this many classes. I was going to take the one class as a distraction from my problems, to get away from them for a bit and be able to think what I wanted to do and such. And then when I decided what to do, someone talked me out of it. So that was a mistake. But I don't have the energy now to go back and do what I should have done in the first place. So I kept taking the classes, hoping that it would make me feel better again, but it is just not working anymore.

And then there's the problem of making all this stuff, just to end up having more stuff. I don't really need more stuff right now. In fact, since I'm trying to get rid of other stuff that I already have, art class doesn't help with that. So I'm trying to think that I need to only make stuff that would be useful to me, or that would really be a good gift for someone that I know, or that would sell at a profit. I really have a problem with getting stuff that would sell at a profit. And then there is the problem of getting any of that stuff that fits in with whatever the assignment is.

I'm currently working on one large thing that might be sold for a profit, and several small things that are just me learning something new. They might be gifts, but they aren't anything that is anyone's perfect gift, so I doubt that I will give away most of them. So when I end up keeping them, at least they are small and are not going to take up much space among the other stuff here. So it should all be good, but somehow it isn't.