Freaky Friday

Well, this Freaky Friday post will be for almost two weeks worth of Google searches. I say almost because I am still missing a bit of the list from before. I am thinking that doing a proper Freaky Friday post ends up taking more time than I would like, so I will probably start making this an every other week feature instead of a weekly feature, or perhaps even just make it a monthly feature. In any case I will not be posting the Google searches next Friday, since next Friday is the day after Thanksgiving, and I will be busy that morning.

A fellow fan of vampire films would like Neville to come out. We must be patient. But it is less than a month away now. I believe the movie starts on December 14th.


Next we have a few more people wanting a mould of penis, a homemade penis mold, dick costumes, giant dick costumes, penis costumes, penis plaster molds body, giant penis's (what belongs to the penis, I don't know), giant penis blogspot, and how to make a mold of my penis. And, here's a new one: pics of wolf's penis dick.


Then we have someone looking for dumb things to pass the time. At least, I think that's what was wanted, but what was typed was dumb things to past the time. Also a search for the dumb things I have done, which would be a long list.


Someone looking for a Mutton coat got to read my thoughts on not being a vegetarian.


Here are some searches that lead people to my review of diet drinks: diet 7 up drink health, drinks that are good for you hibiscus, which has more sugar Coke or Dry Ginger, are diet low-calorie drinks good for you, which soda has more carbonation, black coffee diet drink, is ginger ale better for you than regular soda, diet coke calories truth, and diet drinks are really good for you.


Fans of Rudy's are looking for rudy's barbeque denton tx nutritional value, Nutritional value of Rudy's, rudy's bbq nutrition, nutritional value of Rudy's BBQ, and rudy's bbq waco. To clarify that last one, Waco is a town in Texas, and is not a search for a wacko at Rudy's.


Here are some searches about hell: cause were all going to hell anyway, everyone is going to hell, woman thinking everyone is going to hell, long sermon going to hell, does almost everyone go to hell, and is anyone actually going to hell. Okay, we are not all going to hell anyway. If you are some who is, get help. As for the woman thinking everyone is going to hell, that might be a search for me personally, but remember that I just think that almost everyone is going to hell and not literally everyone. As for the long sermon going to hell, that could mean a lot of things, but for the record having to sit through a long sermon is not the same thing as being in hell. As for does almost everyone go to hell and is anyone actually going to hell, unfortunately, the answer to both is yes.


Someone was looking for a vorlon costume. I'd like to find one of those too. There is also a search for vorlon halloween costume buy, and fairytales gone bad costumes.


People want to know about busiest travel days christmas, and busiest travel days 2007.


Fellow fans of Bath & Body Works were looking for bath and body works Eucalyptus Spearmint Soap, semi-annual sale bath and body works 12/27, and bath and body works wallflowers causing fire. Again, I don't know for sure about the wallflowers fire hazard, only that one of my readers warned me to be careful. Also, someone wanted to find ice cream scented lotion. I don't remember any, but Bath & Body Works would be a good place to look.


Someone is still looking for pictures of the skyride accident. I still don't have any pictures. And I still remember the "accident" being caused by idiot teenagers.


Next is someone looking for the middle of nowhere Kansas. Also there is the long search of kc renfest galerie or bilder or pics or picture or pictures or gallery or photo or photos or galleries or album or gallery. Then someone was looking for Joplin Mo holiday pies for sale, and people who smoke in Joplin. I know, Joplin is in Missouri, not Kansas, but I went to Joplin on that same trip so I thought I'd group them together.


People were looking for nude photographer wife, and freaky nude people.


Another misguided person was looking for Superbowl 2011. We won't discuss that today.


Next we have some knitting related stuff: yarn camouflage, doctor who scarf red heart yarn, and thyme color. I should ask once in a while if someone wants to buy a Doctor Who scarf. But I wouldn't have time to make many before Christmas anyway.

Another person is concerned that a "non custodial parent wants to move." They were directed to my post about making everyone a single parent of one child. This was based on a sci-fi book that I read, but I cannot remember the name of the book or the author.


Someone wants to know about shakey's pizza fennel seeds. I don't remember if Shakey's pizza had fennel seeds. Fido's Pizza in Wichita Falls had fennel seeds, but they've been closed for a very long time.


Someone is looking for freaky atlanta sluts, and a couple of people are looking for dallas area sluts, and someone is just looking for homewrecking sluts. That particular Homewrecking Slut is in the London area, but I'm sure homewrecking sluts in general are in a lot of places. I can't tell you anything about freaky sluts in Atlanta, and really I don't have any insight on the Dallas area sluts either.


Someone found my blog by Googling smashing things. I cannot be of much help without knowing which things are to be smashed.


This next search is a bit outside my area of expertise--how to find out if you are buying a haunted house. Sorry, I don't know.

Then there were searches for all quest cell phones, why is truth the murphy's law, soloflex informercial, and alternate truth.

Someone Googled "star trek" drunk "I'll take you home again." The "drunk" in question was Kevin Riley, though he was not actually drunk, but infected with some dangerous disease that has the symptoms of being drunk. The episode was "Naked Time" from the original series. Mr. Riley locked himself in engineering, turned off the engines, and sang "I'll take you home again, Kathleen" over the loudspeakers for the whole ship.

Someone looking for "m and j show" online diet was directed to the post about last month's Halloween party. I suspect that it was a different M and J who usually win the costume contest if they show up in time.

Someone found my blog after Googling fall on back and elbow 10 weeks cause miscarriage. I suspect that happens a lot. The particular person I was worried about is still pregnant at almost two months.

Some Googled popcorn diet and was directed here. I invented the thing, and for a while it worked. But that probably wasn't what they were looking for.

Okay, here's the count for this week:

Giant Penis--10

People going to hell--7

Diet Drinks--9

Homewrecking Sluts-- 1


Sluts R Us--0


Other Sluts--3

Rudy's BBQ-- 4

Buckets--0

Pies--1

Bath & Body Works--3

Busiest travel day of the year--2


Vorlons--2


And the top twelves keywords are: costume, penis, dick, giant, the, going, hell, texas, state, fair, rudy's, bbq


Okay. Have some fun and have a nice weekend. Leave comments.

Seven "Strange" Things Meme

I have been tagged by Dmarks. I'm not sure what to write about that you don't already know.

1. I love animals, but I don't currently have any pets. It's probably been ten years since I've had a pet.

2. I hate sports. I don't do sports.

3. Unless freaking out the mundanes counts as a sport. I love to go out in costume and do that. I haven't done that in a while. Must do that more often.

4. I think my current costume count is about 10. None of the costumes are things that I wear to bed.

5. In spite of my love of costumes, the only thing that I've ever bought from the Sluts R Us store is nylons.

6. I have recently acquired a taste for overpriced chocolate cake at restaurants.

7. I think that I might be getting sex toys for Christmas.


So how's that for stuff you never really wanted to know about me?



Okay, I am not going to tag anyone because a.) some people find that sort of thing annoying and b.) I think most of the blogs I read have probably done this sort of thing recently anyway.

Of course, you can always volunteer.

Monday Morons--People who smoke

I've been in and out of several colleges now since Fall of '83. I went full-time at a junior college in Dallas county from Fall '85 til Spring '87 and was in PTK. The whole transfer to UTA to get an art degree did not work out, and a few years later I was back at the junior college taking a few more courses while I tried to figure out what else I should be doing. And at first I thought that I would try to do all the stuff that I'd done there before, like Monday lunches with the BSU and PTK meetings and maybe I should even join the geology club. This did not work out, but I tried for a few weeks.

So I go to the first PTK meeting of the semester, and except for one other returning student and a couple of faculty sponsors, I don't know anyone. For me, they're all new people, and for the most part they want to do different things. Anyway, the girl in charge that semester isn't someone I know, and she's talking about something they have planned next week, and she wants us all to meet "where the art department sits around and smokes."

One of our faculty sponsors turns green and tries to waive the girl off, but the girl doesn't notice and keeps talking. A couple of the first time people get a bit upset, cause they haven't been at the school for very long and they have no idea "where the art department sits around and smokes," and they don't think that they should be expected to meet someplace like that. Where exactly is this place? Surely it has a real name, or perhaps it is an empty space between certain number classrooms? There are not signs pointing people towards the place "where the art department sits around and smokes."


I'm having a bit of a giggle over the whole thing. The faculty sponsor says something like "some of the people here are art majors, and some of them don't smoke." The girl in charge turns a bit red and starts apologizing.

The main vocal first time guy says he still doesn't know "where the art department sits around and smokes."

"Actually," I say, "it is where the music and drama departments sit around and smoke. Very few of those kids there are art majors." And then I tell the poor guy that the area in question is at the east end of one of the indoor bridges.

I have always thought that it was odd that the music and drama departments sat around smoking cigarettes. Really, I think that it is odd when anyone does that, but I thought that it was particularly odd for them, because they needed more lung power than most of the rest of us. And here they were wasting some of it on smoking.

So twenty years ago, people already thought that smoking was a bad idea, and if someone implied you were a smoker it was taken as an insult. And we had already known for more than ten years that smoking caused cancer and other health problems. So it was strange enough that there were still people smoking back then.

It's just unreal that people are still smoking now. I can kind of get it that some people started smoking before and got addicted and can't seem to stop, but why are there more people who start smoking now?

I live near a city and all the civilized people are trying to ban smoking. You can't smoke in government buildings and such. You don't usually have to ask for the non-smoking section in Arlington restaurants, because except for a very few places that got a waiver after installing an expensive ventilation system, you can't smoke at all in Arlington restaurants. I'm always surprised when I go out of town to middle of nowhere Texas and find a bunch of people who haven't gotten the memo.

Still, I had a few friends who smoked. They can't smoke much when they're around the rest of us, cause we're usually someplace where smoking isn't allowed anyway. Most people I know who did smoke have quit for health reasons, but there were still a few who would have to leave the group for a bit so they could go outside and have a cigarette.

I remember there was this guy at one of the clubs, and usually when a club function ends everyone gets up and hugs everyone else when they leave. So I hug this guy, and he really smells of smoke. And when I get home, I can still smell the smoke. The smell has transferred to my clothes. So the clothes get washed, but unfortunately my teddy bear sweatshirt always smelled like smoke and I had to get rid of it. The smoke smell just really sticks to leather and vinyl and a few other things like that.

Anyway, the guy at the club got busy with some other things in his life, and he pretty much dropped out of the club. I had another friend who smoked when I was in a different club, but that group disbanded. I have only seen him a few times since then. I can't really think of anyone else I hang around who smokes. So except for the out of town trips, the main time that I have to deal with the smoke is when I am walking into hotel lobbies and certain government buildings and other places where people are outside smoking.

So now there is M the vampire guy. And as much fun as it was to meet someone at a Halloween party who obviously finds me attractive, I just want to be friends. He says being friends is okay, but I'm not sure that guys really mean that. Anyway, I saw him again, and I found out that he smokes. It wasn't noticeable at the party, but it was later. Again, we were someplace that didn't allow smoking, but he was helping me carry stuff out to my car, and once we were outside he needed a cigarette. And I've seen people smoke before, and unless they are actually blowing the smoke at me, it usually isn't a big deal.

But about an hour later, I really started to feel sick. And I didn't feel so good the next day either. Maybe the smoke smell was in my hair or something. Maybe it's just that I'm getting old, and cigarette smoke is one of those things that bothers me now more than it used to.

I don't want to insult the guy, but how can he stand that stuff? I may not have to worry about whether or not he just wants to be friends. This may keep us from even being friends.

Today's regular feature has been delayed

Translation: I've lost about half of my list. I can't do much of a Freaky Friday post without the list. If I find it later I'll come back, or if I find it a lot later I'll just add it to next week's post.

Did I mention that I got two pieces into the student art show? The reception is tonight. I mustn't do anything important today, or I'll get busy and forget to go. The show is in Fort Worth, so my friend K might go and the vampire guy might go. S and his wife also live over that way, but I haven't heard back from them, so they're probably not going, and for all I know they're still out of town.

I have put on a few pounds. I don't think I've gained much weight, but being that I'm not really obsessed with such things, I never even bothered to buy a bathroom scale, so I couldn't say for sure how much weight. I just know that despite all the attention at the Halloween party, the costume didn't look as good on me as when I first started working on it. And some of my clothes feel a bit snug.

I should probably go on the all broccoli diet for a while.

And what have I been doing this past week? Filling the house with candy. There was the half-price sale on Halloween stuff at Target on November 1st, which went down to 75% off on the 4th and then to 90% off on the 7th. And I went to at least three stores on each of those days.

I bought a costume that I will probably never wear, but I will have it just in case. I bought a judge's wig, cause you just never know when you're going to need on of those. I bought a hat. I bought a couple of pictures of skulls who tell jokes to each other. I bought a talking skeleton, meaning to surprise K with it later, but she found one herself so I guess that I will keep it. I bought a bag of 25 candy-filled little Darth Vader heads, cause I just know that I would regret it later if I didn't. I ended up with five of the small gargoyles. I bought a witch spirit ball and some other decorations. I bought some cranberry stuff that I will probably never use just because I liked the bottles. And I bought a bunch of t-shirts, most of which do not fit me as well as I'd hoped.

And, of course, I bought lots of candy. I bought some white tootsie rolls, because this is the only time of year that I ever see any. And I bought some orange and black M&Ms, cause who doesn't like M&Ms. And I bought a few bags of little candy bars that should keep me from buying more candy bars until the next sale. And I bought bags of autumn mix and candy corn, cause those still look good for Thanksgiving, and even if they do not get eaten for Thanksgiving they are still candy and someone will eat them sometime. And I bought about eight bags of black and orange Kissables, which is sort of Hershey's version of M&Ms.

I really should hide all that stuff and eat some broccoli.

Good News?

Well, I thought I would take a break from the usual "this is what I've been doing" post and write about something a bit serious. And I'm not sure how to ease into the subject, so here goes.

A lot of women are going to have miscarriages. Someone did a survey and found out that one out of five pregnant women lost their babies. So that's kind of sad, but these things happen.

Someone else did a survey and found out that our pets and horses and cows and such were also having miscarriages. But the animals had miscarriages at a higher rate. One in three pregnancies ended in miscarriage.

So someone was wondering why the animals were having more miscarriages than people. So they did another study. And in this study, humans and animals both miscarried at the same rate. One in three pregnancies ended in miscarriage.

Why the discrepancy?

In the original human survey, the patients were asked if they had miscarried, and one in five of them reported miscarriages. In the animal study, well, you can't ask animals if they have miscarried. Instead, the information was gathered from veterinarians and people who bred dogs and horses and other people who keep up with such things. Their numbers were based on lab tests.

So, in the joint study, the human patients were asked if they had miscarried, and still one out of five said yes. But, in addition to that, lab work was done, and according to the lab work, one out of three had miscarried. A lot of these women had miscarried without even knowing.

Let me explain. Say that a hundred women are pregnant. But they have only just become pregnant today, and they don't know that they are pregnant yet. In the next two or three weeks, before they even know that they're pregnant, thirteen or fourteen of them have miscarriages. Only they don't think that they are having miscarriages, cause they don't know that they're pregnant. They just think that they are having periods. Maybe it is a bit more painful than usual, or maybe it didn't start on the exact day that it was supposed to, but it was still pretty much just like a period. So they don't report the miscarriage or go to the doctor or anything like that. In the next month or two, the remaining pregnant women find out that they are pregnant, but then later twenty of them have miscarriages. The rest of the women (except maybe one who will have a serious problem that might end either her life and/or the life of her baby) will be fine if they can avoid angry boyfriends, car accidents, falling down stairs, etc....

Enter the early home pregnancy test.

So now we have a bunch of women who are trying to get pregnant, and every week they go to the drugstore and buy these tests. And every morning a bunch of them are looking at these little sticks and wondering if they've done the test right, and maybe it just takes longer for it to change color, and what does this look like to you? And some of them happily run out and buy some sparkling grape juice, cause they're giving up alcohol cause it's bad for the baby.

And a couple of weeks later, about ten percent of them are crying in the bathroom.

Okay, someone I know went to the drugstore and bought two of the early home pregnancy tests. And the little sticks changed color and all of that stuff. And later a blood test confirmed the results of the first two.

Don't worry, it isn't me.

Anyway, this person doesn't want everyone to know, cause she's afraid she's going to be the one in three who has a miscarriage. Telling someone who would tell me was probably not the best idea, if you don't want people to know. On the one hand, they are happily doing things that couples do when they are expecting, only they are trying to do it without anyone noticing. On the other hand, she's trying not to get too excited, since sometimes she doesn't feel well, and she doesn't feel well in a way that is like how she feels right before she has a period. Every little twinge makes her panic.

She's had about six tests now. She's definitely pregnant. She's wondering when she should tell people.

Personally, I think that she should tell everyone right away. I understand wanting some privacy and all that. I understand not wanting everyone to know that you're going to have a baby and then find out later that you're not having a baby and have to deal with all these people coming to tell you how sorry they are. I get it.

But if you're really concerned that you might lose the baby, don't you want as much help as you can get? Don't you want people you work with to know that you shouldn't be doing the heavy lifting and such that is usally part of the job? Don't you want someone to kind of check up on you when your husband is out of town? Don't you want a few people to be ready to help out if there's a problem?

Of course, I don't want any babies. Maybe I'm just imagining the situation all wrong, because I have trouble picturing myself being in it. I don't know.

Maybe they shouldn't have told me.

Monday Morons--Haunted Houses

Well, I am always a bit down after Halloween. It is over for the year. I know that it will be back next year, but I didn't get to do all of the stuff that I wanted this year.

I make myself feel better by planning the stuff that I want to do next year and by doing lots of after-holiday shopping.

Not that I'll actually do everything that I imagine next year either.

Anyway, this year I did not do much, because I was out of town a lot. While I was out of town I went to this place. It used to be the location of the Catacombs, but it was bought by the people who run The Beast, after the owner of the Catacombs died in an accident. So, technically, the Chambers of Edgar Allen Poe was a new haunted house, and since I'd never been to the Catacombs I don't know how much was kept of the Catacombs attraction.

I love The Beast, and their other place, The Edge of Hell isn't bad either. Both of them are really big haunted houses in four or five story buildings with giant slides at the end. They can take almost an hour to get through. But my husband didn't really want to go to The Beast again, and he is a bit of a Poe fan, so we went to the Chambers instead.

I like mood lightning in a haunted house, or dim lighting. I'm not a big fan of no lighting, except many for just very small stretches here and there. But I don't like places where you have to feel your way about for very long, and unfortunately all three houses have more of that than I like. But the Chambers was really bad, cause there were several places where you had to step up or down a bit, and the lighting wasn't good enough, and I'd trip or stub my toe or something. Not a lot of fun.

But what was really bad was a small staircase, with only four or five steps, and there was no lighting. Complete darkness. So of course I fell down the whole thing. It felt like a really bad fall. But I got up okay, and nothing appeared to be broken. I got a bad bruise on my knee, and I felt bad for a bit, but not bad enough to go to the hospital or anything.

But I don't get how that happened in the first place. Usually, people go through a haunted house and point out problems like that before a house opens. And that was a major problem that shouldn't have needed anyone pointing out. The neccesity for having proper lighting near stairs should be obvious.

Not nearly as bad is something they have at the Dungeon of Doom in Arlington. At some point you are going through the house, and you step on this turntable thing and fall backwards a bit. Not that you actually fall down, cause even if you lose your balance completely, there's a wall behind you. I've complained about the thing, and I've been told that it's been tested and that no one ever falls down. It's completely safe. Thanks for pointing it out, but there's nothing to worry about.

Which isn't to say that for some of us, it doesn't still hurt.

I haven't been back. I don't like things that intentionally make a person stumble, even if there's no danger of falling and really getting hurt. It is still a very unpleasant feeling.

Besides, I like a bigger haunted house. For an extra five dollars I might as well go to the Boneyard. Unfortunately, I did not go to the Boneyard this year, so I can't comment on their new place. I went a couple of years ago and really liked it. I got some free tickets, went again, and still liked it. They seem to have really bad luck finding locations, and this is their third or fourth place, and I believe they've only been in business for about six years.

Well, if I'm not out of town, I'll be going to see them next year.

Freaky Friday

Being the week of Halloween, there were a lot of searches for costumes and such. Mostly, the Trick Dick costume or the Giant Penis costume. One searcher particularly wanted a professional penis costume. I'm not sure if that means a costume that is professionally made or if the specific penis in question is employed, but whatever.

Other costume searches in the non-penis variety include two vorlon costumes, fairy tales gone bad costumes, and Halloween striped nylons.

Other Halloween searches in the non-costume variety include the truth about Halloween, Halloween party gone wrong, 15 floor haunted house, and Halloween parties in Dallas needing a DJ.

We have a search for almost everyone goes to hell and does premarital sex mean you are going to hell? No, premarital sex does not mean that you are going to hell, just not being a Christian means that you are going to hell. I would think that there is more premarital sex going on among non-Christian than among Christians, but other than that I really can't say much about it. Except sometimes the premarital sex is so bad that you just think you're in hell.

People read the diet drink review after Googling vernors diet calorie, half regular coke half diet coke, how much calories in a glass of pepsi, are diet drinks like diet coke any good, what is the calories regular Dr. Pepper, is fresca an okay drink, and 64 oz fountain drink. Personally, I do not like Diet Coke. There are 100 calories in most regular sodas like Dr. Pepper. In my opinion Fresca is an okay drink. And, if I'm ever going to lose any weight, the 64 oz fountain drinks will have to go.

Twice, someone was looking for where to buy fireweed jelly in maine. I do not know where to buy fireweed jelly in Maine or anywhere else. So far as I know, I've never had fireweed jelly. I do, however, like fireweed honey, which I usually had to wait for a ren fest or something to buy. But now they sell the stuff at Central Market, so I only have to make a drive to Fort Worth.

Someone Googled bath and body works what is black dot. I have no idea.

Next, someone Googled busiest travel days, and that set the tone for the rest of the week. After people Googled busiest Christmas travel days, busiest travel days of the year, 2007 busiest travel days, Christmas busiest travel days of the year, busiest travel times of the year, busiest traffic day of the year, and what will traffic be like on the day before thanksgiving? All these people were directed to the Almost everyone is going to hell post.

JUST KIDDING! All those people were directed to a post I wrote about having to drive from some small town a few counties away to the DFW area on the day before Thanksgiving. I was surprised at the lack of traffic on that particular road, and it stayed that way until we got to the DFW area. But most of that traffic seemed to be going to the mall instead of people traveling for the holiday.

Someone Googled killed chicken, and someone else Googled mutton coat. Both of them were directed to my Thoughts on not being a vegetarian post. Is is just me, or is "killed chicken" an odd thing to Google?

Someone Googled fennel pizza. They were directed my post on Favorite Eating Places, where they could read about the long gone Fido's Pizza in Wichita Falls. So that didn't help if they were wanting to buy the pizza. Okay, so if you're just dying for one of these pizzas, this is what you do. You go somewhere and buy a cheese pizza, and ask that they take it out of the oven a couple minutes early. Then you take it home and brown at least half a pound to a pound of breakfast sausage on a skillet, and then add like the whole little bottle of fennel seeds. Well, maybe that's too much, so just try half the bottle. Then you put the fennel seed and sausage mixture on top of the pizza and put the pizza in the oven for like five minutes. You're not supposed to add more cheese, but you might try it anyway to help the sausage stick to the pizza.

Poor Dmarks. Someone found my blog by Googling "christine baranski nude." How did my blog get a higher ranking than his on that one?

Someone wanted to know about deal or no deal canada audition. While, I didn't go to the Canada audition, though I suspect it would be a lot like the one I went to, only much colder. Good luck.

Last we have someone looking for the Ultimate Sweater Machine. They can be fun once you get used to them. But they do take a lot of getting used to.

Okay, here's the count for this week.

Giant Penis--19

People going to hell--2

Diet Drinks--7

Homewrecking Sluts--0

Rudy's BBQ--3

Buckets--0

Pies--0

Sluts R Us--0

Bath & Body Works--1

Busiest travel day of the year--21

And the top twelve keywords are: costume, penis, dick, giant, the, texas, going, state, fair, hell, rudy's, bbq.

Thanks for stopping by. Have fun. Leave comments.

Happy Halloween

Here it is, my favorite day of the year, and what am I doing?

Nothing.

Well, not actually nothing. But nothing that has to do with the holiday. I am finishing up a class project. We have class tonight, and it's one of those deadline days where you're supposed to show a finished project and show your sketches and such that you worked on first. So even if I were in a position to skip class tonight, I still wouldn't get to skip class tonight.

Not that there's really any reason to skip class tonight. I don't want to go to the Boneyard bad enough to spend twenty bucks and go by myself.

And I won't be giving out candy tonight either. There are too many old people in the neighborhood to bother with buying candy for trick-or-treaters. One year I made the effort, and got maybe four kids to stop by.

I don't even have a pumpkin carved yet. I need the pumpkin for an art project, and if I carve the pumpkin it will rot before I can finish the project. So no jack-o-lantern.

And of course I can't wear a costume to class, cause I'd get clay all over it.

Anyway, it all sucks.

About the only thing I get to do today is go look at the stores and see where I want to go tomorrow for the after holiday sales. Not that I get to spend that much. I only have about fifty dollars left this week, and I'll need to spend half of that on gas.

Okay. Enough whining. Back to work on the dragon.

The Halloween Party

Okay, in my Star Trek fan club, the Halloween Party is the big deal of the year. Even more so than say, the New Year's Eve Party. Some people plan all year for this party. I'm sure that there are people who are already thinking about what they are going to wear next year or what kind of food to make for the weird food contest.

Halloween is pretty much my favorite holiday. Maybe not quite so much as it used to be, because I now have other places to wear costumes and such. But I still really like it and look forward to the party and other stuff that has to do with the holiday.

This year Halloween has almost come and gone without my noticing it. Well, maybe not quite that bad. I did go to a haunted house in Kansas City and spent an hour or so at this thing that the school had, and now I've gone to the club party. But I didn't enjoy the haunted house that much because of the accident, and I didn't put as much effort into getting ready for the party like I had planned. And, with our being out of town half the month, I didn't even bother to put up Halloween decorations.

Or, at least, I didn't bother to put out any more Halloween stuff. I have some Halloween stuff that pretty much stays out all year. But most of it is currently in boxes, and this year most of it stayed in boxes.

Anyway, back to the party.

I took the Soylent Green stuff for the weird food contest. I didn't even get an honorable mention this time, probably since it was obvious I didn't do any cooking or any other sort of food preparation. Soylent Green is supposed to be square, and maybe an inch and a half or two inches across. I found some of that candy that you melt into molds, and it was almost the right color green, and it comes in a sort of disk shape and is about an inch across. I could have melted it and then cut it into squares, but I was lazy. I figured that little Soylent Green disks were close enough. And I put up signs reminding people that Saturday was now Soylent Green Day instead of Tuesday. Anyway, I had fun with it, but did not win anything.

The winner of the weird food contest was the Seven Levels of Hell Dip.

Okay, in years past there has been the big debate on whether or not to continue hiring DJs for the party since a.) that is a lot of money to spend on just the one thing for the one night, and b.) the DJs rarely do exactly what we want anyway. One of us usually ends up doing the announcements and such, so mainly we don't need the DJs so much as we need the DJ's equipment. If we didn't hire the DJ one year, we'd save enough money to buy our own equipment for the next year. So last year, we did not have a DJ, but instead borrowed this and that from club members and friends of club members. And I thought that all went well, though my friend K complained that since the music wasn't loud enough and people weren't dancing. This year, we bought some of our equipment.

Somehow, the music did not go as planned. Not so much because of the equipment, but because of problems with Napster and Sony CDs. We had been working on the music list for months. People requested songs, and people in the club that owned CDs let us borrow and copy the songs, and the songs that weren't on CDs that one of us owned were downloaded from Napster. Only when they were setting up for the party, the stuff copied from Song CDs wouldn't play, and the the Napster stuff had a message that we couldn't play the songs without first paying a license fee. We did pay a license fee. Being good law-abiding citizens was the point of getting the songs from Napster instead of downloading them from a free site.

Anyway, by the time I got there they were playing music, but a lot of it wasn't music that people had requested to hear. So again my friend K complained that no one was dancing. Me, I just don't dance anyway. I think the problem with people not dancing is mostly in K's head. I think people don't dance because they don't want to get too tired before the costume contest or their feet hurt because of the high heeled shoes they bought to wear with their costumes.

If the goal for the party is to get most of the people to dance most of the time, then the should just make a loop with Thriller, stuff from Rocky Horror, Monster Mash, the Macarena, and Star Trekking Across the Universe. Everyone dances then. Everyone except me anyway.

The children's costume contest was won by a girl dressed as a Harry Potter character, Miss Luna Lovegood.

Did I mention there was a couple of special theme prizes for the adult costume contest? I stayed out of the discussion, but the rest of the group thought that Fairy Tales and Fairy Tales gone wrong would be cool. Not that you couldn't wear something else, but you were encouraged to think of something along those lines.

I thought of something right away, but I wasn't sure that I wanted to wear it. But earlier I had threatened to show up in my underwear, or at least, my evil twin's underwear, so I started looking for something that might work. I found a red bustier and red underwear and a skirt that just barely covered my butt. I cut off the pink roses that were on the bustier and added black lace. Instead of wearing red gloves I made something that just covered my arms from between the shoulder and elbow down to the wrist, that way I wouldn't worry that I might lose a glove when I took them off to eat. And I made some boot covers that went higher than my knees. I hate my knees. I already had a black cape, and I thought that was close enough and they would get the idea, but at the last minute I decided to go ahead and buy a red one. And I bought a riding crop on eBay.

At first I was going to make a wolf-fur riding hood, but after I bought the fake fur I couldn't bring myself to cut it.
At the party there were about ten of us who went with the theme. A couple of people in fairy wings, a woman in an off-the-rack Snow White costume, a guy who altered his Van Helsing costume to be the Fairy Godfather, and a Wolf.

And five girls in red riding hoods.

Before I arrived someone calling herself Miss Riding Wolf was showing pictures of Mister Wolf and their five puppies. Then there was me. Then my friend K showed up as Miss Riding to the Hood. Another girl came as Miss Rotting Hood, who had come back from the dead to get revenge on the wolf.

Then M and J showed up, and if M and J show up in time to actually be in the costume contest, game over. M was the Wolf, and J was Miss Blood Red Riding Hood. Like Miss Rotting Hood, J was also wearing a bit of zombie makeup, but J was also wearing high heels and a corset and striped nylons and other things one might buy at the Sluts R Us store.

I had thought that maybe one other person would be Red Riding Hood, but five of us? And all of us were after the Best Fairy Tales Gone Wrong award, not just the Best Fairy Tale award. I hadn't really come up with a special name for my character. I ended up with Miss Red Boots and Riding Crop.

Miss Riding Wolf was one of the judges, so she did not receive an award. M and J won for Most Scary. I won for Most Imaginative. Miss Rotting Hood won the Best Fairy Tale Gone Wrong. Miss Riding To The Hood didn't win anything.

Best in Show went to Uncle Festus and his wife. I'm afraid I don't remember most of the other awards.

Since we were all trying to get the Fairy Tale Gone Wrong award, the Best Fairy Tale went to the lady in the off-the-rack Snow White costume. Whatever.

Rende was in charge of the party this year, and she was too tired to come up with any Rende awards. Usually, she has some help with that, but the other person was out of town. So no "My, this chair is cold" award for me.

After the costume contest, one of our younger friends asked where the after party was. After party? What after party? Most of us were too tired to totally enjoy this party.

People were dancing. I don't dance. The Wolf and the five Red Riding Hoods posed for a picture. We posed for more pictures.

About an hour before the party was over, I started getting a lot of attention, mostly from a couple of guys not in our club. I had just mentioned to my friend S that I nearly didn't wear the costume, since I seemed to have put on some weight since I got the idea to do this, and the costume just didn't look as good as when I bought the bustier. And then everyone is telling me how great I look, mostly a friend of Miss Rotting Hood's father and M the Vampire.

Funny, but I don't even remember seeing M the Vampire before, and then he just rushes over to talk to me and stays at our table the rest of the evening. I'm not sure that we had met before. He came with M the Klingon, and is not planning to join our club. As much as we would like to be in everyone's club, most of us just don't have the time.

Then there was a discussion of how I should have put elastic on the boots and the arm pieces. They kept slipping and I kept pulling them back up. At the end of the evening I was having to do that about every five minutes. I could have invented some new dance, like the Macarena or something. Then I'm showing some people how I made the boots and saying how I hated my knees. So I took of the boots and showed the flawed knees, and was told I was seeing some minor thing that no one else noticed.

More guys came over to add their own comments.

It is the last dance, and M the Vampire has noticed that I'm not wearing a ring. That is a long story, and I say that I don't really want to get into it. It's not really a secret, but I think that most people have forgotten about it, and I'd just rather not deal with it during the party. I pack up some leftover food, put on some more comfortable shoes, pack the boots and the wolf fur, and grab a centerpiece. I've got a lot of stuff to carry. M the Vampire helps me get everything to my car.

Not that I didn't appreciate all the attention at the time, or at least most of it, but it did make me a bit nervous. Now I'm feeling a bit weird about it. Probably M the Vampire isn't a vampire most of the year. Does he think I normally walk around hitting people with a riding crop?

Well, except for the after holiday sales, Halloween is mostly over for me this year. I have school Wednesday night, so unless I go to the Boneyard or another haunted house Tuesday, that's about it. And I probably don't want to go to a haunted house by myself.

Freaky Friday

This week has been a busy week with the Google searches. I usually print the list twice a week, but this time I printed the list three times and still managed to miss a few things between Tuesday morning and Wednesday afternoon. Probably mostly searches for a giant penis or dick costume. The week before Halloween just has a lot of those.

Someone Googled Neewollah haunted house. But if there was such a thing, I didn't find out about it much less get to go to it, so I'm sure I wasn't much help there.

Next someone Googled why did I take that job, and was directed to my post about working at the Halloween store last year.

Someone was looking for Underwoods Barbecue Dallas. I don't know if Dallas ever had one. I'm pretty sure that there isn't one now. Anyway, you're better off without it.

Someone Googled the smell of diet Coke. Okay. Other readers of the diet drink review Googled half regular half diet Coke, Fresca how much grapefruit, and Coke mixed with half a glass of milk. Coke mixed with milk? Yuck.

Someone else wants to know about five gallon buckets stuck together.

I am currently the number one Google search for Almost everyone is going to hell. Also in that category this week we have two searches for "are a lot of Christians going to hell?" Well, technically, there are no Christians going to hell. However, there may be a lot of people calling themselves Christians who are are going to hell, or the really sad case of people who think that they are Christians who are going to hell. But no actual Christians are going to hell.

We have more people looking for Rudy's BBQ.

Here is a really long Google search: kc renfest mud galerie OR bilder Or pics Or picture Or pictures OR gallery OR photo OR galleries OR album OR gallery. You have to really go a ways down the list to get to my posts about the Kansas City Renfest, and like most of my other posts there are not photos.

Someone was looking for the Marie Callender's semi-annual pie sale 2007. I did actually get a pie during the recent trip. For three weeks I planned to buy a blueberry pie or maybe some other fruit pie, but then I ended up buying a key lime pie instead. Anyway, the sale was for the month of October. If the one sale is in October, then you'd think that the other one would be in the month of April, but I have been unable to confirm this.

Someone Googled cheat for Freaky Friday. I have no idea what that's about.

Some Googled Kansas middle of nowhere, and someone else Googled Price Tower Art Center. They were directed to the posts I made in October of 2006 during that trip to Kansas and north Oklahoma. I didn't blog about them as much this year. Didn't feel the need to totally rewrite the same posts.

There were a couple of searches for Babylon 5 Garibaldi shoots Bester, and they were directed to my post about meeting the guy in the Vorlon suit.

Someone also Googled "Sarah Jane Smith" and "type of car." I would think that this has to do with the Dr. Who spin-off, but I haven't a clue about cars in general and don't know about this one in particular. Sorry I couldn't be of any help.

Someone Googled "killed chicken." I'm not sure what they were looking for, but they were directed what I wrote a few days ago about deciding not to be a vegetarian.

Someone Googled Murphy's Laws and Other Truths and was directed to my post about having to be in a group photo next to someone who couldn't even bother to put on a clean shirt. I have another post that they might have liked better, but that's probably not what they were looking for either.

Someone was looking for 15 floor haunted house in Texas. I don't know about it. If you do, please share. I love haunted houses, except maybe for the one in Kansas City that I fell down in about three weeks ago.

Among the many, many searches having to do with the giant penis costume, someone wanted to know how to make a plaster mold of husbands penis. I can't help on that one.

Someone Googled Dallas International Wildlife Park. It wasn't in Dallas, but close by in Grand Prairie. I worked there for a year. It's been closed now for over ten years. It took over the place after Lion Country Safari left. No one is there now that I know of. And you shouldn't go looking too hard for them. Remember that trespassers will be eaten.

Someone Googled Bath and Body Works Wallflowers and risk of fire. I don't really know about that. Just that one of my readers warned me to be careful with them.

Someone just Googled insidious, and I don't have a clue if they were looking for me or what. Maybe they were looking for the Homewrecking-Slut. That would be funny. Really, that had been the idea, but I doubt that ever happened.

Someone Googled "If they don't wear a costume." Well, some people are just dull, aren't they?

A couple more people were directed to the post about not being a vegetarian by Googling "my rabbit coat" and "leather vegetarian." I had a one-time reader leave a comment on that one.


Okay, here's the count for this week.



Giant Penis--22

People going to hell--3

Diet Drinks--4

Homewrecking-Sluts--0

Rudy's BBQ--3

Buckets--1

Pies--1

Sluts R Us--1

Bath & Body Works--1



And the top twelve keywords are: costume penis dick giant texas state going fair hell the rudy's BBQ





Everyone have a fun and safe weekend. Leave comments.

Well, it is good to be home, sort of

Well, I knew that I had left the kitchen and such a mess. But somehow it was still a surprise when I came home. Not so much the kitchen, which I remembered was in total disorder even if I did manage to get the dishes done before I left, but the rest of the house. I go away for a while and I forget how much junk is...well...all over the place. I've spent a little more than two weeks in four motels, where the room mysteriously gets clean all by itself while I'm out having lunch.

Here, the place never gets completely clean no matter how much time and effort I try to put into making that happen. Not that I often put that much effort into it. It is a difficult thing for me to attempt, since I know that even if I do manage to get the place straightened up it will soon just be all messed up again.

So coming home is always a bit of a shock.

It takes me a while to get things going again. It slowly dawns on me that breakfast isn't going to magically appear in the kitchen. Not even something that sort of resembles breakfast, like donuts or bagels. Nor can I really make any breakfast or even something that sort of resembles breakfast, because we've been gone for two weeks and haven't gone grocery shopping yet. I didn't even think to buy any milk yesterday.

We do have something that just vaguely resembles breakfast. We did manage to go to the Marie Callender's Semi-Annual Pie Sale. But after three weeks of planning to buy a blueberry pie, well, the key lime pie looked really good, so we bought that instead. Somehow a piece of key lime pie seems even less like breakfast than fruit pie. And we don't even have any milk to go with it.

As much as I enjoy art class, I have discovered that I really do not enjoy it after being gone for two weeks. I wanted so much to get things done ahead of schedule, and now I am two weeks behind. I left a piece to dry, but without being there to remind the professor, he forgot to fire it. But it is a terra cotta piece that I do not plan to glaze, so that is really no big deal as long as he does remember to fire it next week. I had mostly finished with my wire sculpture, but really I have already lost interest in it. The project I had been working when I left was ahead of schedule for a bit, with the tile models mostly finished, and I was just waiting for the plaster to arrive before I did some final touch-ups and cast them. The plaster did not arrive when it was supposed to, so I really didn't get anything done that last week. The plaster came while I was away, and was all used up. So I had to wait for more to arrive and finally cast two of the tiles Tuesday night. I did not get all four tiles casted as the professor insisted I should be able to do. I did not follow his advice and have the tiles all lined up and ready to pour, because for me the most time consuming part of actually pouring plaster is cleaning up the bucket so that I can mix the next batch of plaster. If I had thought about it, I could have gone to the dollar store and bought three extra buckets and just thrown them away afterwards and not done much cleanup at all, but I didn't do that. So I was just using the one bucket and I didn't see any reason to leave the tiles out to get dried up while I was washing out a bucket. So I have to go in again this morning and pour two more tiles before I can do anything else.

So I am now behind on everything that I was already working out, I totally missed all of the classes when the other students were carving soapstone, and I've now made two false starts on my pumpkin project. Tonight I think I will totally start over again.

Oddly enough, until Monday I hadn't really thought about my grades in this class. I don't need the credit for anything, and I don't think I even have to worry about passing this class to get on to a next one. So I wasn't really concerned about it. Of course, I cannot allow myself to get a bad grade, even on class I'm just taking for fun. The grades will get added to my GPA, and if at some point I actually decide I want another degree, I can't let that slip, just in case. Anyway, this professor teaches art classes, mostly to non-art majors. He likes to give out grades based on something other than outstanding artwork. Not that outstanding artwork isn't appreciated, it's just that he feels that these students who aren't great artists and who are being forced to take an art elective should still have a chance at getting good grades if they put in the time and effort. So sometimes one of his classes has almost half of the grade determined by quizzes, which don't require any artistic talent at all. For some of his classes, he has found ways around the rule of not letting a student's attendance determine part of his grade.

So Monday I figured out that the grades for this class are almost entirely determined by meeting deadlines, at least two of which I am probably about to miss.

Somehow, I am not done with my Halloween costume either. I took the thing with me and worked on it a lot during the trip, but it still needs some work. And I think that I must have put on a few pounds, cause it doesn't look as good on as it did when I first started working on it.

Not that having deadlines is anything unusual in a college class. But I'm not used to having art classes set up that way. Maybe you have to have a number of things really to be graded at mid-term and the rest completed by finals week, or maybe you don't even have a mid-term evaluation and just be aware of how much work you have to get done and have everything completed by finals.

Anyway, I hadn't really given it much thought. I was under the impression that if I got behind I could either file for an incomplete or just drop the class and keep working on my projects anyway. But if grades are totally determined by deadlines, I don't suppose filing for an incomplete would help anything.

I had totally forgotten about the student competition, and yesterday I had the pleasant surprise of learning that two of my three pieces are going to be in the show in Fort Worth. I have two pieces in, and a friend of mine has two pieces in, and a couple of former classmates have two pieces in. No one got all three of their pieces in, so I guess that's pretty good to get two in.

Anyway, if I'm in the student art show, they would probably not like it if I dropped the class. People in the student art show should actually be...officially...still students of the school. See?

So far as I know, I didn't win anything, other than just getting into the show. Professor said that they wouldn't announce that until the reception two weeks from now, but I don't think that's right. Two of my friends won stuff last year, and they knew before the reception. Otherwise they wouldn't have bothered to go to the thing.

I have to work on one of those "it's an honor just to be nominated" sort of things.

But really, I have no objection to winning ribbons and such.

And cash awards are really nice things to get.

Well, I was going to come back after class and write some more, but I think that will have to wait. I will get caught up with the posts and reading other people's blogs eventually. It is nice to have my computer instead of the company's laptop.

Thoughts on not being a vegetarian

One of my readers posted something on her blog about buying some fur and then not having the heart to wear it. Rather than leaving a really long comment on her blog I thought that I would write something on a similar subject here.

But before we get into that, I would appreciate it if more people would go back to Friday's post and answer the question about Soylent Green. So far I think that only two people have responded. Though to be honest, the party is Saturday, so at this point I would probably go ahead with it anyway.

I remember a few years back that a bunch of us somehow got on the subject of vegetarians. I think the conversation started about dieting and the possible health benefits of not eating meat, but my brother then started going on about how he didn't like vegetarians. He said that they were a bunch of weirdos, and that what really pissed him off was that they acted like the rest of us "normal" people were idiots, like they didn't even know that they were the weirdos. It's not like there is another immoral about eating meat, but that is the way they act.

For some of them, I'm sure that is the whole point. They do think that it is immoral to eat part of a cow who was minding her own business eating grass, and they will tell you so, if the subject comes up. My brother, on the other hand, would tell you that murdering unborn babies is immoral and having sex with a same sex partner is immoral and a number of other things are immoral, if the subject came up. But for some reason the vegetarians are supposed to keep their opinions to themselves, because they are supposed to know that they are weirdos.

While I will agree with my brother on the subject of murdering unborn babies and all of that, I tend to think that we non-vegetarians are the weirdos. Not that I give it much thought anymore. The fact that there are more "normal" people than vegetarians in this country doesn't matter. There is just something weird about eating dead animals. And the idea that "everyone is doing it" has never mattered on any other subject, and has not caused me to start smoking, drinking, or using other recreational drugs (exceptions being caffeine, chocolate, and sugar). I don't see that the vegetarians should see the error of their ways because the are in the minority.

I remember choosing not to be a vegetarian when I was five or six years old. I knew that I could not give up eating meat. I was just to accustomed to having it. I was addicted. I wished that my parents had done a better job of raising me at that point, but it was too late.

Before that I just hadn't realized that we were eating dead animals.

We were eating dinner, and for some reason I decided to ask why a chicken leg was called a chicken leg. Did it just look like a chicken's leg? And why was a chicken wing called a chicken wing? A chicken wing didn't look anything like a chicken's wing. The words thigh and breast meant nothing to me, so I did not ask about them.

My parents tried to explain that a chicken leg was in fact a chicken's leg. That made no sense to me. Surely there wasn't a chicken hopping around without one of her legs. Maybe I hadn't made myself clear? A chicken was a white bird that lived at Grandma's house and laid eggs, right?

My parents did finally convince me that the chicken leg did in fact come off of a chicken, and no, there was not a chicken hopping around on one leg. Earlier that year they had tried to explain about the rabbit's foot key-chain that I'd won at a carnival, but I hadn't really believed them. Being from the south, there was another name for Brazil nuts, and I was pretty sure that wasn't true.

To be on the safe side, I stopped eating Brazil nuts for a while.

So I did not want to eat any chicken after that. But then I found out what hamburger was and what sausage was and hotdogs and all of that. The dead animals were in just about everything. Except maybe spaghetti and cheese pizza and a few things like that. So I did wonder if maybe I could just eat spaghetti all of the time, but I was told that the rest of the family would continue to eat chicken and hotdogs and hamburger, and there would not be any extra meals of spaghetti or anything else prepared just for me without a good reason. That I just didn't want to eat dead animals was not a good reason. I would get used to the idea like everyone else.

I did think of one way out of this. I had a biblical argument all worked out. There were four guys in the Bible who refused to eat meat, and God rewarded them with all kinds of stuff. So I figured that I could convince Mom that it was okay with God for me not to eat chickens and such. And then she would have to help me.

But I never made the argument. The problem was that these four guys in the Bible did not eat spaghetti and cheese pizza and such. Mostly, they ate beans. And I hated beans more than anything else.

And I really did like eating chicken and hotdogs and all the rest of it. Though I think that I did have to have hotdogs explained to me. No way was I going to eat a dog.

So I keep eating the chicken and such, but for twenty years or so I did not add any new meats to my diet. Anything that I knew was an animal before I'd eaten it was off limits for a while. No goat, no frog legs, and no rabbit. Those were pets, not food. I still don't think that I've tried rabbit. But I did eventually get around to some of the rest of it.

At some point I learned about leather and fur coats. Leather seemed hard to do without, since that's what most of our shoes were made out of. But I think that most of the leather came from cows, and since I was already eating hamburger and hotdogs and such, then I might as well keep wearing leather.

The fur coats were a different matter. I didn't eat rabbits. And I certainly didn't eat foxes, and I never would, cause they were too much like dogs. So I shouldn't wear fur coats if I didn't eat whatever animal the fur came off of.

I watched game shows on TV and saw people winning fur coats. And I thought that if I were on those game shows and won a fur coat that I would have to give it back.

Bob Barker quit giving away fur coats on The Price is Right. Great. If it ever was an option, I could be a contestant on that game show.

When I was about thirteen, everyone was wearing rabbit coats. I didn't want one. Most of my friends had one, but I wasn't interested. And they weren't even good looking coats. They were soft and warm sure, but they were odd looking. Someone had killed all of those rabbits to make coats that weren't even attractive, and people were wearing them.

I found a mutton jacket in the closet. Not the least bit in style at the time. But it was soft and warm and it was very pretty. It was almost twenty years old, and my mother had worn it. She hadn't worn it in about ten years and had no intention of wearing something that out of style, but somehow she never could bring herself to throw it away either.

I liked the coat even if it wasn't in style. It certainly looked better than those awful rabbit things that my friends were wearing. I reasoned that the animals that were killed to make the coat were already dead, and had been for about twenty years. There was no reason to let the coat go to waste. It wasn't like buying a new coat, which just encouraged people to kill more rabbits.

So I started wearing my mom's old mutton coat. This apparently got my grandmother and my mother talking. It was a pretty coat, but I shouldn't be wearing something that out of style. If I hadn't gone to private school, I would have worn all kinds of odd things. I didn't care what was in style, and I would have worn a number of strange things if I could have gotten away with it. The coat was really a minor thing, hardly worth mentioning.

For my next birthday, my grandmother bought my a rabbit coat. Not one of these ugly things that my friends had, but a really nice white one that looked good with my church stuff, but still didn't look bad with my casual stuff either. It really looked like "me", except that I probably would have picked the black one instead.

And, of course, since I didn't eat rabbits and was against buying new fur coats, I wouldn't have picked any of them.

My mother knew this, and she should have explained it to Grandma. But she didn't. And I just couldn't hurt my grandmother's feelings by refusing to wear it. And it wasn't so awful that my grandmother would buy something made from rabbit skins. My grandmother used to eat rabbits, so she didn't see a rabbit coat any differently than I did leather shoes. If you're going to eat something, you might as well not waste the skin.

So I did wear the coat, though it did take me a long time to get comfortable with it.

I don't have the coat now. My mother managed to take care of her mutton coat for twenty years, but I was a teenager and my rabbit coat didn't last anywhere near that long. I didn't store it anyplace special when I wasn't wearing it, so the second year it shed rabbit hair onto everything. My favorite color was black, even then, so the white rabbit hairs that stuck to my clothes really stood out. I think after a few years, my mother threw the thing away.

I don't think that I have any real fur now. I don't mind buying fur second hand. The money usually goes to some charity instead of someone who kills animals, and I don't worry that more animals will be killed to replace the inventory. But I'd never buy a new fur coat. There's some real pretty fake stuff now. I bought a bunch of fake fur for a costume, but after I got it home I couldn't bring myself to cut it. It's really pretty, and I'm afraid I'll ruin it.

Every once in a while, I still think about being a vegetarian. I've pretty much gotten past the fact that I'm eating a cow who used to be out in a field minding her own business. Somebody killed a cow so that I could eat it, and I'm still not crazy about the idea, but I try not to think about it. And if I do think about it, I reason that she probably would never have been alive in the first place except for the fact that someday she was going to be eaten. But once in a while I think about the health benefits, and the fact that eating meat takes almost a hundred times more resources than eating plants. And I'd probably lose a few pounds if I stopped eating meat, so that's aways something to think about.

One more thought on the subject. It really ticks me off when people call themselves vegetarians and then they turn out not to be vegetarians. If you don't eat any meat, you're a vegetarian. If you've decided not to eat red meat but still eat fish and maybe chicken, you're just on a diet, you're not a vegetarian.

I tried to explain this to one girl, who still insisted that it was okay for her to call herself a vegetarian, even though fish and chicken were killed to be part of her diet. "I'm not doing it for that," she said. It doesn't matter why you are doing it, the fact is that you are not a vegetarian, and you are very annoying for saying that you are, and it makes you look very stupid besides.

Okay. End of rant. Leave comments if you like.

And don't forget the Soylent Green question from Friday's post.

Joplin is closed on Monday

Not quite a Monday Morons post. Sorry.

Well, I did not blog much about our time in Independence, Kansas. It was pretty much like last year. Same motel and everything. And we made a second trip to Price Tower for lunch. This time we also did a tour of the Phillip's house. Or, at least, most of the tour of the Phillip's house. We left it early, because we had reservations at the restaurant at Price Tower, and the tour was taking longer than we had expected. We need not have worried. There were plenty of empty tables at the restaurant, but I after reading on their website that reservations were recommended I was surprised that they weren't busy. They were even less busy than they were last year, but that's probably because we were there earlier. Anyway, my apologies to the tour guide for leaving.

We made an attempt to go to the Safari Park we missed last year, only to find the reason we didn't go last year is that this late in the year they only open on Saturday or for expensive private tours. We didn't want a private expensive tour, so we went to The Little House on the Prairie instead. We had gone there last year too, but we didn't have the camera then, so we went back. Still not much to see.

So after the week in the middle of nowhere Kansas, my husband has to work a few days in middle of nowhere northern Oklahoma followed by a couple of days in another place in the middle of nowhere south Kansas. In between both of these places is Joplin, Missouri. We decided to stay there for the week.

We had briefly debated about going back to Kansas City for Sunday and Monday, but except for a bit of shopping we'd already done most of the stuff that we usually do there. And we briefly discussed going to other places in Kansas or Missouri or Oklahoma, but decided against that. Going to most places in Oklahoma is either a) not that big of a deal anymore, and or b). probably something we have either done recently or possibly will be doing again soon anyway. The other places in Kansas or Missouri that we either haven't been to or wanted to revisit we decided were farther away than we wanted to drive. So we spent all of our days off driving to and then staying in Joplin.

Having made no plans concerning Joplin, I expected to be quite bored and spend even our days off mostly in the motel. Again, we briefly discussed driving over to Branson, but decided against it. Anyway, in the motel lobby we found a little map with stuff to do in Joplin and recommended restaurants and such. According to the little map, the best dinning experience in town is Mythos, and it was just down the street from the motel.

So we were going to Mythos, but then it turned out that a.) they did not serve lunch except for private parties and b.) they weren't open on Sundays.

We instead had lunch at Sandstone Gardens, which my husband described as "like Garden Ridge on steroids." Anyway, they sell a lot of stuff if you want to be Martha Stewart, and they also have a little restaurant that sells desserts, Starbucks coffee, soup and salad, and overpriced sandwiches. Not that the sandwiches were bad. I ordered the turkey sandwich, expecting to get a sandwich with like...sandwich meat. I am so used to sliced turkey, I forget that it comes in other forms. This was more like the day after Thanksgiving kind of turkey and not bad at all. And it came with a lovely salad and a piece of chocolate cake.

After lunch we paid about seventeen dollars to go and see a couple of friendly parrots and a collection of reptiles. The alligator and crocodile were both very clean. There were four cobras, and three of them were not happy, so you could tell that they were cobras. One of the other snakes is as big around as I am. Nice snake.

Then we went back to the motel and spent some time in the hot tub, which was the main reason for choosing that particular motel. We must have gone to dinner after that, but I don't remember where. Anyway, we hadn't planned on doing much on Sunday. The drive from Independence to Joplin wasn't a long one, but we were a bit tired anyway.

On Monday we had planned on doing a lot of stuff, only to find out that most of the stuff was closed on Mondays. This happens to us a lot. Museums that are open both Saturday and Sunday are typically closed on Monday. At least, that is the way it is around here, so there was no reason to think that it would be different in Joplin. But, we forgot about having this problem on Mondays until we got out the map and tried to pick what we wanted to do first. Joplin has a museum, which was a bit of a surprise, but it is closed on Mondays. And they also have the Spiva Art Center, which is also closed on Mondays. And we were going to go take pictures of a waterfall, which was near the Wildcat Nature Center (Audubon Society), but we had planned to do both on the same day only to find that the nature center was closed on Mondays.

Not closed on Mondays is the George Washington Carver birthplace. So we went there. Being raised a Baptist, I have often heard the joke about Mr. Carver getting to talk to God, and he asks God a lot of questions, only to be told that God won't answer his questions because the answers wouldn't fit in his brain. So Mr. Carver asks about smaller and smaller things, but still God tells him the same thing. So finally Mr. Carver asks God why he created the peanut, and apparently God thought that was something he could handle. Mr. Carver then invents about three hundred things made from peanuts.

Maybe Mr. Carver should have asked God why he created the black walnut. There are black walnuts all over the place. But the black walnuts probably wouldn't have done anything to help the sharecroppers the way that growing peanuts did. So it's just as well that he didn't.

Next we looked on the map to find a place for lunch. We laughed when we saw a diner that was listed as having the best chili in town. So we went there, only to find that they we closed on Mondays. So we went to a place called the Sultan of Smoke and had brisket sandwiches instead. These were big sandwiches. And as usual the BBQ was a bit messy. There was enough stuff that fell out of my sandwich that I could have taken it with me and made a second sandwich later.

We spent most of the rest of the day doing the same dumb stuff that I would have done if we'd been at home. We went to Goodwill and bought some boots that will be part of a Halloween costume, and we went to Hobby Lobby and Walmart and JoAnn Fabrics. We even managed to find a mall with a Bath & Body Works.

After that we went back to the motel for a bit before going to dinner. We had an early dinner at Mythos. We probably shouldn't have spent that much money, but we'd already gotten it into our heads that we should go there, and most of the rest of the week he would be working and we wouldn't be having dinner together. So we went, and the food was good, but it wasn't my favorite.

We decided to then go back to the motel and watch Prisonbreak. Only Prisonbreak wasn't on. There was some stupid ball game instead.

Oh, well. Back to the hot tub.

Freaky Friday

Again, as I am traveling, I cannot write a proper Freaky Friday post, since I do not have a complete list of this week's Google searches. I did make a note of a few of them.

But before I get to that, I would like to poll the audience and see if they remember the movie Soylent Green. Now we all know that Soylent Green is people, or at least, I hope so. If some of you have not seen the movie, I apologize for not giving a spoiler alert, and I hope that I haven't ruined it for you. Anyway, Soylent Green is people, but do you remember if the Soylent products were sold in chunks or cubes or granules or squares or circles? I actually know the answer myself, but I was wondering if anyone else would remember. I am thinking of serving some at the Halloween party, but the product I bought isn't the right shape, so now I'm wondering if I should bother with it. Would all the fans of the movie point to it and say "That's not right" or voice some other objection to it?

Anyway, if you're reading this, I'd appreciate a comment on the subject of serving Soylent Green or other Soylent products at Halloween parties. That includes new readers and people who never plan to read this blog again.

Okay, now I'll talk about some of the Google searches.

Someone from Ireland found my blog after Googling "There's nothing nice about me...Almost everyone agrees."

There's been a lot of traffic to the "Everyone is going to Hell" post. Actually, my post said that almost everyone is going to hell, not everyone, but usually everyone is what gets Googled. This week someone wanted to know if her (or maybe his?) jewish boyfriend is going to hell. I was about to say that, yes, he is, but now that I've given it some thought I'd better not say that. For all I know the boy in question was born in a Jewish family but later became a Christian. People from all races can become Christians. So I guess that I should say he is probably going to hell, just like almost everyone else.

Someone Googled Superbowl 2011 tickets. I think that person might be going to hell.

And, speaking of hell, someone Googled "why did I take that job" and was directed to a post about me wondering why I had agreed to work at the Halloween store. Luckily, I did not make that mistake this year, which allowed me to go on this little trip.

Someone from California Googled "non-custodial parent wants to move to Alaska and take child" and was directed to my post about making everyone a single parent of one child. I just happened to use the example of the custodial parent moving the child to Alaska. I don't think that my post helped.

Most of the traffic to my blog this week has been about the giant penis costume. Someone wanted to be a bit more specific and Googled "plastic costume penis", so maybe he wanted something else entirely. Someone from Dallas Googled "penis bags." I had a look at the search and found articles about medical problems and some disturbing questions from people wanting to know if it is safe to use a Walmart plastic bag if you forgot to buy a condom. One guy even went so far as to say that he'd had sex with an high-risk female using the Walmart bag instead of a condom. This made me wonder what is considered a high-risk female by a man stupid enough to use a Walmart bag instead of a condom. Anyway, just in case you are ever tempted to use a Walmart bag instead of a condom, don't. If money is a problem, the 99 cent store sells condoms. I can't say that I've used them, but I do go in the store a lot so I know that they have them for sale.

Someone Googled Altrusian, and a couple of people Googled Vorlon costume. I wish those people would leave comments. I can't follow those people back to their blogs without them leaving comments. Funny that I can follow people who use the next blog button but not people who Google things that interest me.

Since I don't have much of a Google search list this week, I won't even try to do a count.

The top twelve search words are: costume penis texas state fair going giant the dick hell BBQ rudys

Have fun. Leave comments.

Freaky Friday

Well, I cannot really do a proper Freaky Friday post today. I have been traveling, and I only have the Google search list since Tuesday. I have no idea what was going on between Saturday night and Tuesday morning, and I don't remember what was going on last Friday and Saturday.

Mostly, there are people looking for the Tricky Dick giant penis costume. This close to Halloween there are a lot of people interested in costumes. And I am now number one in the search for "freaky looking penis."

One person Googled Vorlon costume, and was lead to my post about meeting the guy in the Vorlon suit.

I usually find a lot of people have read the diet drink review. But this week there was only one reader (that I know of), and that person Googled Taz drinks. Interesting search. I'm not sure what it means.

A few people were looking for Rudy's BBQ. No one looking for KC Masterpiece or Jack Stacks, just Rudy's.

Someone was looking for "KC renfest 2007 pics." I was like number 332 in the search, and as usual, my post did not contain any pictures. Weird.

Most of the other people were looking for stuff about the State Fair of Texas. One person Googled "McDonalds" "State Fair of Texas." I'm not sure that the two are related, and they are certainly not related in my blog. So let me repeat the important info. With three cans of food you can get into the fair on Wednesdays for one dollar. Dollar Dogs are actually a dollar if you order them without chili or cheese and such. Dollar Dogs is located between the Old Mill Restaurant and Big Texas. Dollar Dogs also has a very small lemonade for $1.50. And Borden's sells pints of milk or juice or tea for a dollar at the Food and Fiber Pavilion. Most other food at the fair will cost at least four dollars, and most other drinks cost at least three dollars.

Okay, as I said I missed a lot of the Google searches, so I cannot do a complete count. But there were at least 13 people looking for a giant penis, one person who read the diet drink review, ten for the State Fair of Texas, and three for Rudy's.

And the top twelve keywords are now: costume texas state fair going the penis dick giant hell Rudys BBQ.

The main fun part of the trip

We began our trip by driving to a suburb of Oklahoma City. We have made trips to Kansas City before, and if we drive straight there we are usually too tired to enjoy ourselves. So, Saturday night we drove almost four hours to get to our first motel. Maybe we should have reserved a room in Davis instead. That last half-hour or so was hard. We were listening to The Invisible Man during the drive, so it was mostly okay,and it didn't seem terribly long. But that last part was past our bedtime.

There were waffles for breakfast Sunday morning. I started to make them myself, since that is what one normally does, but one of the motel employees jumped up and said "I make the waffles here." Okay, not a problem, make us a waffle. Whatever.

We left the motel at about nine and arrived at about four. One the way we listened to a young adult book on tape and we stopped at a couple of McDonald's. We're going to win that million dollars any day now.

Once we got to the Kansas City area we went to dinner at KC Masterpiece. We didn't go to the location we have gone to on previous trips, and this restaurant somehow didn't seem as nice as the other one. But the food is still good.

After dinner we went to one of the new haunted houses in Kansas City. I discovered an ad for this one just the day before, and it had an Edgar Allen Poe theme. I wondered if they had bought out the competition, and one of the workers told me that they bought the building after the owner of the other haunted house died.

I'm sorry to say that at this time I cannot recommend the new haunted house. There were several places with steps that were not proper lit, and at one point I fell down four stairs that were not lit at all. I have not gone to the hospital, as I think that this bruise on my right knee is the worst of it. I think by the end of the week I won't even notice it.

Monday we went to the Kansas City Renaissance Festival. I was a bit worried that the festival would not be as good on one of these Monday holidays that we all tend to forget about. But there were plenty of people there, and we were early enough to get a really excellent parking space.

We had two pleasant surprises. I had expected the tickets to be in the fifteen to twenty dollar range, but on that day there was a special price of 2 for $15. Cool. Next, when we went to watch the first two shows, those particular entertainers had decided to decline tips.

Apparently, the place was filled with dimwit teenagers. Not that there aren't normally dimwit teenager at the fairs, but those are somewhat dimwit younger versions of us, and these were just regular dimwit teenagers. For some reason, whole bus loads of mostly unsupervised teenagers were encouraged to come to the fair that day. Maybe they even got in for free. Anyway, they were not "us" and I'm sure that they didn't have a clue about tipping at the end of shows or anything like that.

The weather that day started out cloudy, but it didn't actually rain once we got to the fair. Later the sun came out, and the weather was perfect. But it had rained on and off the whole weekend, and being there on the third day after all of that was a bit unpleasant. There was just tons and tons of mud. Straw was put out Saturday, but by Monday it wasn't of much help.

We did the usual stuff. We went to see the Jolly Rogers. When it came time to collect tips, Devon was pulling money out of someone's bra with his teeth. We usually watch this big bald guy juggle bowling balls, but he wasn't there that day. And we watched the falcon show and a joust.

I tried to be good and not spend much. I bought a dram of fragrance oil called Thunderstorm. We bought a dozen incense sticks, and my husband bought a DVD. My husband stood in a long line to get a cappuccino, only to be told that the machine wasn't working. We had a blueberry scone and some kettle corn. Since we had been to KC Masterpiece and were planning more barbecue in the near future, I did not want any meat sandwiches or anything remotely like barbecue. So I had a Pirate Special crepe for lunch. Not bad.

We're old. We get tired sooner than we used to. We left right after the joust.

From there we went to another barbecue place called Jack Stack Barbecue. We had the burnt ends starter and the Roundup Dinner for Two with cheesy cornbake. This was more like I remembered from the other KC Masterpiece. We ordered extra sauce and stuff to go, so with the tip and all with ended up spending almost sixty dollars.

So yesterday, I was really tired. On the way from Kansas City we listened to a Stephen King story. After I got here, I ate lunch, and that was about it. I didn't do anything except watch TV. I didn't knit or anything.

Well, earlier I had said that if I didn't pack properly or if I needed a common yarn or sewing item, I wouldn't need to worry since that stuff was available at most Walmarts. Unfortunately, this particular Walmart has recently gotten rid of it's fabric department and most of the craft stuff. So no purple yarn, and no elastic. The purple yarn I can do without, but I can't work on my Halloween costume without more black elastic. This rather sucks. And if there is a fabric store anywhere in the county, I can't find it in the phone book. I found two places that fix sewing machines. Surely someone sells fabric and such if there's two places that repair sewing machines.

Oh, well. I will have to find that stuff during the weekend and work on it next week.

The computer is a bit odd. I cannot find things as easily as I can at home. Yesterday, we couldn't get online at all. Most of the time, I can post stuff on my own blog, but I cannot leave comments on other people's blogs. So that's all a bit odd. Not that I'll have much time on the computer for that sort of thing anyway. But I hope that everyone keeps writing, cause I am still trying to read stuff even if I can't leave comments. And the stuff that I can't read I'll read after I go home.

Monday Morons--Us

I'm either going to post this very early, or maybe I won't actually post this until Tuesday, I'm not sure which yet. As you may recall my husband and I are going to Kansas for a bit. So I'll either be posting this before we leave or after we get there.

Anyway, my husband requested an assignment in Kansas so that we could spend some time in Kansas City and go to the ren fest and maybe do some other stuff. He must have made this request two months ago. I think he repeated the request three or four weeks ago.

Did we clean house and do laundry and pack and get stuff ready just in case we got to go?


Of course not.


A little over two weeks ago we were looking at the schedule and saw that we were going to get to go to Kansas and that we were going to get to go at the right time to go to the ren fest and such. Did we clean house and do laundry and pack and get stuff ready to go then?


Of course not.


A few days after that my husband got a phone call from his boss confirming that we would be going to Kansas and that he would be working in northern Oklahoma the week after the week in Kansas. So we didn't have to worry about that long drive home right after we went to Kansas City. So we're getting to do a bit more tourist stuff cause we're staying longer. Did we clean house and do laundry and pack and get stuff ready to go then?


Of course not.


I have been trying to get my school art stuff a bit more organized so that I don't get too much behind while I'm away. I made that my priority these past two weeks, but for various reasons that didn't work out the way I had hoped, and I'm just going to have a ton of work to do when I get back. Or I might file for an Incomplete. I don't know. I'll have to talk to the professor when I get back.


So is the house clean and the laundry all done and are we all packed and ready to go?


Of course not.


Okay, so the house doesn't actually have to be clean for us to take a trip. But the yard is supposed to be mowed and some stuff like that done, and some of it did not get done. And I guess I have this fear of something happening to us while we're away, and someone will have to come in the house and see that I haven't cleaned the bathroom or the kitchen in a month. Stuff like that tends to bother me a bit and keeps me from totally enjoying the trip.


Not that it bothers me enough to get up and clean the place.


My husband goes out of town often enough that he always has some of the stuff already packed. It's then just a matter of washing and packing a few more shirts and some socks. And if you run out of socks you can always buy more at Walmart, so we don't worry about that too much.


I also have been out of town often enough that some of my stuff stays packed. But not as much as his, and often I unpack something and I forget where I put it.


So the beginning of our trip is now just hours away, and I'm doing laundry. Most of the house cleaning will just not get done. And I still have to sort through yarn and get the knitting machine and such ready to go.

I have not even made good use of my time today. I found some coupons that I had misplaced, so I keep wanting to make one more trip to Bath & Body Works. And there's a bunch of yarn on sell at Hobby Lobby. And there's always a few things that I should pick up at Walmart. But I finally managed to limit my errands to buying gas, buying lotto tickets, eating lunch, and dropping off something at my brother's place.

I talked to my mom for a bit. We discussed something which is going on with a family member which we are not supposed to be talking about. So why did she tell me? I can't talk about it if you don't tell me.

I have almost finished packing. Actually packing clothes and toothpaste and such doesn't worry me much anymore. If I forget to pack socks or even pants I can buy some more wherever we're going. If I forget to pack certain colors of yarn or something that goes with the knitting machine or something that goes with the Halloween costume that I am working on, that would be really annoying. If I forget to pack my birthcontrol pills, then I'm seriously screwed. So that's what I worry about packing: birthcontrol pills first, Halloween stuff, knitting stuff next, and clothes and toothpaste last.

Damn, I forgot to go to the library. I'll be right back.

Okay, that's one more thing off the list. About an hour left. The dishes are washed and the laundry is done. The clothes and the birthcontrol pills are packed. The knitting stuff could be a little more organized, but I think it's okay.

Some of the yarn is missing. Maybe it's already in the car? If not, it's a common color available at most Walmarts.

Do I want to wear a purple flower wreath to the ren fair? Probably not, as I do not think I will be wearing anything else that day that is purple.

I need an aspirin. I think that I packed some aspirin. I think that I'll go unpack it.

Okay, the house is still a mess, but there are clean dishes. Where did all this junk come from? I had most of it straightened up during all the drama last year. But most of this stuff is mine, so it can't just be that his stuff is in my way.

Just waiting for my husband to get off from work. Any minute now I can get out of here.

Just waiting. Any minute now.

Got to go. Later.

Freaky Friday

Yesterday I went to Bath & Body Works and used a coupon that I printed off of the computer. Some of the coupons say only one coupon per customer per day. This one said only one coupon per customer. And the sales lady knew I'd been in the store the day before with the same coupon. She politely said that she was on to me, and if I come back the next day with this same coupon I won't be allowed to use it again.

That's okay. I have three more Bath & Body Works stores that I go to on a regular basis. And I have different coupons that don't limit how many I can use. But, to be fair, I knew that was supposed to be a coupon for new customers and not supposed to be used more than once. I think between the four stores I used eight of them.

On to the Google searches.

Speaking of Bath & Body Work coupons, someone came here looking for them. I have this one, and this one. Unfortunately, both of them expire on October 14th, but I'll try to remember to post links to any new ones I get. This sale started yesterday, but unfortunately the $3 room spray sale ended Wednesday.

Here are searches for tricky dick costume, giant penis costume, extreme giant penis, giant dick costume, and my favorite this week in this category is "freaky looking penis." In case you missed the original post, you can find it here. Oh, I just noticed the new comment. Anonymous would like me to "Get a sense of humor." Of course I already have a sense of humor, or I wouldn't have posted the silly thing.

There are several people looking for Rudy's BBQ this week. People want to know about Rudy's green chile stew, Rudy's BBQ coupons, and Rudy's BBQ nutritional information. I still don't have those last two. This is my post about Rudy's, and I do mention the green chile stew, but it's not my favorite.

Someone Googled I cannot find color code of yarn. Well, I've had some headaches with that sort of thing myself, and I don't even use the kind of yarn that you need to find the code. So good luck with that.

Someone Googled Halloween Nail. I don't even remember what that led to.

Someone Googled 7-7-07 marriages and was led to this Monday Morons post.

Now here is a search for "public restroom" "stealing toilet paper" motor. Unfortunately, that person was led here, to the entire month of June. I think that this post, with this link, was what they were looking for. But they might have enjoyed this Monday Moron post as well.

Someone else came here looking for soloflex coupons, and I still don't have any. I never every said anything about soloflex. Just someone left me a comment and mentioned it.

Now we come to the popular question, "Is everyone going to hell?" Well, not everyone. Just almost everyone. You can read about it here if you want to.

Someone Googled parents IQ vs. number of children. Well, that isn't quite what I wrote about, but it is a post that I put some thought into. I hope someone enjoyed reading it.

Someone Googled eBay coupons. I was wondering if selling coupons on eBay was legal. I don't know. Someone sent me some links on the subject but I haven't looked into it yet. I'll have to get back to you later.

Here's another popular question. Are diet carbonated drinks good for you? Not exactly. Here's the diet drink review. My post was number four in the search. Nice.

Here is someone who Googled BRING CANNED GOODS TO THE STATE FAIR OF TEXAS. Okay, that's a good idea. The funny thing is that the person is in Chicago. He's going to have a long drive. Anyway, if you don't know, on Wednesdays you can get into the State Fair of Texas with three cans of food and one dollar. For additional expenses, read yesterday's post.


Okay, here's the count for this week:


Giant Penis--9

People Going to Hell--1

Diet Drinks--1

Homewrecking-Sluts--0

Rudy's BBQ--4

Buckets--0

Pies--0

Olenjack's Grill--1

Sluts R Us--0


And the top twelve keywords are: going the hell costume rudys penis giant BBQ for diet how calories